LOrI LoUgHlin aNd oliViA JaDE Teaspill
Buckle Up; this is your one stop shop roundup/thought-peice/hot-takes on the admissions scandal from a Lori Loughlin and Olivia Jade perspective. All thoughts are my own, all tho(ugh)ts are real people. I’m about to press my foot on the metaphorical accelerator and it basically won’t ever come off so either crack-yourself up (Don’t do real crack please MODA does NOT think crack is cool) or get out.
Olivia Jade: Youtube influencer. Makeup mogul. Amazon prime student ambassador. A girl of many titles, non of which she wanted were “college student”. Olivia said, and I quote “Ya, I didn’t really want to go to college. I’m mostly here for the tailgates and parties.” Was there literally 0 communication that occurs in that household?! At no point was Olivia not like “college isn’t for me, don’t spend 500,000 dollars on something I don’t want.” Or alternatively if she did say that, why were her parents like “O no sweetie you don’t know any better trust us” and then proceeded to fully break the law to “help” their children. That’s psychotic. Major Crackhead energy.
Also can we chat for a second about how Olivia was an Amazon Prime Student Ambassador? It’s ironic because never has there been less of a student, and of the thousands that attend USC, whoever chooses these ambassadors couldn’t have found a better option? The people you are paying to look like pretty students ought want to be actual students. WILD.
Next, Lori just pled not guilty in the court case regarding this issue. NOT GUILTY. She claims that her and her husband didn’t know that the money they spent was going towards anything illegal. You know why that is crazy? They spent 500,000 dollars and DIDN’T KNOW WHERE IT WAS GOING? Imagine! Having that much money and being able to just hope it’s going to good use. If they aren’t criminals they are morons, probably both tbh.
I no longer have the energy to engage with this. Two big take-aways for you lovely readers. First, smoke less crack. Second, if you spend 500K, make sure you know where it is going.
Cover image via