Your Aesthetic Based on Your Dorm: Expectations vs. Reality

In this article, I will make a series of assumptions, some based off of the architecture and stereotyped cultures of the dorms themselves, some based off of memorable interactions I have had with people in the dorms, and some completely based on vibes. I would not take this too seriously if I were you.

Max Palevsky: Expectations

For Max P, I drew the aesthetic from the delightful, vibrant, not at all clashing color scheme of the dorm. The gray carpets, orange walls, and blue, purple, and yellow windows create a color palette that was last acceptable in the eighties. I envision chunky, patterned sweaters with jeans, paired with more modern, trendy pieces like crotchet tops and faux fur bucket hats.

Max Palevsky: Reality

The bright colors of Max P (and perhaps other substances) have irreparably destroyed your sense in fashion. People do not think you look cool when you wear shirts with smiley faces and mushrooms on them, you look like one of those guys who take acid once and try to mansplain the concept of empathy to you.

Snell-Hitchcock: Expectations

Snitchcock’s library and Gothic outside that perfectly matches the Quad epitomizes the pretension of the dark academia aesthetic. You read "The Secret History” once while sitting in Harper and think that morals don’t apply to the elite.

Snitchcock: Reality

You made sure to wear your very best track suit so that you can have full mobility while you run around campus to win Scav and because you haven’t done laundry in 3 weeks. But fashion and basic hygiene is stupid anyway, you just aren’t shallow like other people, right?

North: Expectations

Your Pinterest board looks something like this. Lots of blues and whites to match the color scheme of the dorm. You alternate between the “that girl” cute corporate look and flowy skirts and dresses which you can wear on your trip to Greece paid for by your consulting job that’s waiting for you after graduation. I think I am associating North with luxury because of the coveted North apartments.

North: Reality

At least you are sticking to the blue, minimalist theme you go for!! But when Baker reminds people of a hospital so much that they willingly eat Bartlett food, I had no choice but to picture you in scrubs.

Burton-Judson Courts: Expectations

BJ’s vibe is somewhat similar to Snitchcock, but way more chill. They buy crystal necklaces from Etsy, and their go to outfit for lounging on the quad during one of the 5 nice days in Chicago’s spring months is a crop top and maxi skirt.

Burton-Judson Courts: Reality

You are stuck in a 2019, indie oversaturated vsco crisis. You brag to everyone about how many monsters you drink in a day, blissfully unaware that no one cares that you can only consume caffeine in juice form. You regularly raid thrift stores just to resell your finds on depop at a huge profit. To make you feel better I will admit that I may or may not have worn butterfly clips to Summer Breeze (shameful I know).

Renee-Granville… Idk —SOUTH: Expectations

To be honest, I do not know much about South, but from what I have heard, it sounds like a very homey, chill environment. You guys crave that classic simple look that we saw Rachel Green emulate on Friends.

South: Reality

Ok, it’s not that this look is ugly, but you will see a girl wearing this to a frat party fully believing that she is changing the game. It’s not giving Parisian, it’s giving Old Navy.

I-House: Expectations

You guys suffer the worst with that faraway location. No one will ever be able to understand you and how hard your life is because of how far I-house is from everything else. But you guys romanticize your sadness, and so I dub you emo/grunge. I also bought the Koss Porta Pros and wear them in Hallowed, and the pain they cause my ears pairs perfectly with the MCR blasting through them.

I-House: Reality

To me, you guys represent all that Uchicago has to offer: gothic architecture, pain, and suffering. And so, I thought what better way to represent your dorm than a literal example of the “life of the mind.”

Woodlawn: Expectations

Despite being the newest dorm, you are shooting for that old money prep aesthetic mixed with some athleisure for bide rides, squash games, and hot girl walks. You were very popular at your prep school, and you are counting down the days until you can go back to Martha’s Vineyard.

Woodlawn: Reality

Your attempt at athleisure mixed with old money means you just wear a lot of Uchicago merch. Also, Woodlawn is pretty much all of the class of 2025, who either bought way too many Uchicago sweatshirts and are trying to get their money’s worth or people who don’t have the creativity to wear something else. I also included a picture of Katniss escaping the Capitol’s fireballs to acknowledge the repeated arson that you all have had to deal with. Props for surviving though!!